15 February 2012

Rubber 2010 - REVIEW

Let me start off by saying I never had any intentions of watching this film at least not until a friend asked if I'd seen it and said he'd like to see me review it. So, like the good friend that I am, I did it. I watched it. I sat through the whole 82 minutes. That's 1 hour and 22 minutes... 1 hour and 22 minutes!!

Robert, the tire, wakes up to discover he's been abandoned in a desert dump. As he rolls along the desolate landscape, he realizes he possesses telepathic powers that enable him to destroy anything he wants. While he's quite content using his abilities to blow up bunnies and crows or crush scorpions and spiders, all that changes when he crosses paths with a beautiful, mysterious woman. After a hit and miss with a pick up, Robert turns his "anger" towards humans as he tracks the woman from one place to the next leaving a trail of dead bodies behind him.

I don't even know what to say about the cast of this film. The acting left a lot to be desired but I don't think that's a reflection on their part. I think with the crap they were given they managed to pull through it. Even veteran actor Wings Hauser seemed to get bogged down in bad dialogue and his was probably the best performance of the whole lot. Jack Plotnick, the accountant did a fair job when he was actually given something to do. BTW, without going to IMDb, how are you suppose to know he's an accountant? Did they say it and I was so bored outta my skull that I missed it? With the exception of Stephen Spinella the rest of the cast is inconsequential because they either appear once and get blown up or they just walk off screen and never come back.

I understand that this was suppose to be "all about the art". I know there are paintings out there that people look at and wonder what it is and without explanation, the interpretation of said painting can differ greatly from one person to the next. I think it's fair to say that about many things books, sculptures, films. On the other hand, if I'm gonna take the 82 minutes of my day to sit down and watch a film, I don't want to have to wonder what the fuck I just watched. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind is an art house film. Memento is an art house film. This is far from an art house film. Yes, the cinematography was nice. The direction was okay but seriously, how far can you take a film about a rogue tire??

Basically Rubber is a film within a film, black comedy that pays homage to "no reason". Why is the alien in ET brown? No reason. Why did the characters in Love Story fall madly in love with each other? No reason. In retrospect, I guess this "no reason" thing works out pretty well for this film since I can't give you one single fucking reason why you should waste 82 minutes of your time watching it. I didn't find it funny or amusing or at all interesting for that matter and I find it quite absurd that this film actually got a theatrical release. I've seen independent art house films that struggled just to get a DVD release and this trash gets into a theater. I feel sorry for anyone who actually paid money to see this ridiculousness, unless you miraculously enjoyed it and then... yay you. I want a refund and I watched it for free on Netflix. If it hadn't been for Beau Nelson, I never would've even looked twice at it. By the way, thanks for that Beau... you owe me 82 minutes! Want something fun to do? Go grab some pliers, sit down and yank your toe nails out one by one. That would be less painful that sitting through this one.

2 comments:

  1. I've been wondering about this movie. Netflix keeps telling me I would love it - good to know now that Netflix is probably wrong.

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  2. I heard the hype & queued it up on Netflix. I then promptly had one of my greatest naps ever. Glad I'm not the only one that did not like this one.

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